Original Entry: October 15, 2008
McMinnville, OR
Yet you
father has cheated me by changing my wages ten times. However God has not allowed him to harm
me. Genesis 31:7
And he
said, “’Look up and see that all the male goats mating with the flock are
streaked, speckled or spotted, for I have seen all that Laban has been doing to
you.’ Genesis 31:12
When the
people saw the thunder and lightning and heard the trumpet and saw the mountain
in smoke, they trembled with fear. They
stayed at a distance. Exodus 20:18
It was the
morning of day five of our mule deer hunt in the Strawberry Wilderness of
Eastern Oregon as I rolled out of my bivouac tent. I had drifted from sleep to awake throughout
the night listening to what sounded like large rain drops pelting the tarp over
my small tent. To my chagrin, I woke up
to another six inches of snow. Snow for
a mule deer hunter is the ultimate equalizer but with a green horn high school
student and a half a day’s rations left it wasn’t joy that gripped me.
It was
fear.
Standing
on top of this basin glassing a bull elk at 1000 yards with nothing but snow as
his back drop is a sight I will never forget.
For over an hour I sat trying to come up with the safest plan until I
decided we would walk the five miles out, find a shower, and come up with
another plan.
Looking
back I regret that decision to walk out. Some might say I was acting
responsibly. Some would say I was wise
being low on food. But in my heart I
know I was driven by fear on several different levels.
Fear often
causes men to hedge their bets.
In Genesis 31:1-12, we see the same
conflict in Jacob. Jacob wrestled with
the promises of God and the problems of the moment. He was caught between the tension the hope of
his future and the dilemma of his present.
In verse 12 when he prays, “For thou didst say, I will surely prosper
you, and make your decedents as the sand of the sea, which cannot be numbered
in multitude (NASB).” He knew what God has promised and still wrestled. How
often to we do the same? How often do our present conflicts cloud God’s
promises? Jacob was so conflicted that he actually “divided the people who were with him” (7).
Fear can
be paralyzing. It has a way of causing
us to stay at a distance (Exodus 20:18)
instead of moving forward. Faith defeats
fear when a man throws all of his eggs into one basket, unloads all the
bullets, and jumps in. Lose it all or
gain it all, but life is too short to not risk it all.
Fear is
the enemy of men. Defeat it by choosing
to be unwavering in the promises of God.
“Yet he (Abraham) did not waver through unbelief
regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory
to God” (Romans 4:20).
